4.4.19

She was having trouble focusing.. her beautiful handwriting shook and she was trying her best to be as helpful as possible. Just as she used to call us every Ramadan, my sister and I to make sure we had everything in place before Ramadan so we could focus on our Ibadahs, she wrote us a checklist. She was tired talking, so she did her best to write it all down. This was one of the last checklists we have from her. She spent her last efforts of being able to talk with us.. till she had no strength left to say anything at all.. I miss hearing her. Her voice still ringing in my ears.. alhamdulillah.

Though she knew she was on palliative care after struggling for 20 long years.. my insides are constantly screaming and crying at the fact that she understood what it meant to be on palliative care.. she was just waiting. She was waiting for Ramadan. She left us on Ramadan’s 1st. Alhamdulillah. She’s no more in pain, is all that eases the pain for us of losing her.

You leaving ma, is my biggest loss in life. May Allah bless your soul, and grant you amongst the highest of darjaats in Jannat ul Firdous. Aameen. May He make us, and our children a continuous source of sadqa e jaariah for you. Aameen, summa aameen. Can’t wait to meet you again, in shaa Allah.
———————————————-
Ramadan # 3 without you.